How to know if there is something more going on between you and your hookup partner?

I once found myself in a situation. I met a guy in a one night tinder hookup app where all people find their hookup partners. I was in a bad shape of my life. I didn’t have a job and I was worried about my rent for the next month. Being in such a bad situation did not curb my sexual desire, so I decided to find someone on one night hookup app for something casual. That was how I met him. We hooked up for two months. During that two months, I got a job and had stable income, strangely, I found myself wondering about my relationship with my hookup partner. We agreed that it would be just pure hookup and nothing more, but we would share breakfast and dinner once in a while and we would even hang out for other purposes except sexual activities. It took me weeks to figure out what we were because I really didn’t’ what to spoil what we had at that time. Now we are happily married.

Several days ago, my friend asked me the same question I asked myself several years ago. It suddenly occurred to me that I was not the only one who have wondered about this question. There is one most significant sign I think matters the most in a hookup relationship. So now I am going to share my personal experience and understanding in regard to this issue.

Your social circle overlaps. I didn’t mean that you are introduced to each other by your common friends. Of course, that also counts. The best scenario is that you are introduced to the social circle of each other during your one night hookup. Usually, your hookup partner won’t show up at your party with your friends, no matter how fun this party is. Your hookup partner won’t stay over till the morning waiting to be discovered by your family member or your roommates. You won’t be introduced to any of their family member or friends. Therefore, if you find your relationship has jumped out of this principle, that might be a sign shows that your relationship is more than just casual hookups.

If you find yourself being invited by your hookup partner to a party where their friends or family will also be at present, or you are the one that makes the invitation, then it might mean that your relationship is changing. Everyone has the responsibility to keep their friends and family out of unnecessary social contact with random people. If they are doing this, you are probably not a random person.

Being in part of your social circle means commitment. It might take someone time to pick the right clothes or the right gift to bring along. It might also mean that you will be introduced to his close friends. If they are talking about their cousin or family members, then it shows they care you enough to let you enter their world and social circle.

Back in a few years, I didn’t realize it until I was known by all his friends and some of his family members. I was quite slow in this field. One day, I was with his high school classmates going over his old album from high school, laughing at his awkward posture in pictures. It suddenly occurred to me that this was definitely not the usual routine for hookups. I got so panic and I went home right away. From that day, I stopped answering his phone and avoiding meeting him until I figured out how I truly feel towards him.

It was about one week later. I was certain that we were more than just trans hookup partners. We had a long talk and established our relationship. We didn’t have our first official date until we hooked up for three months.